After almost three years after leaving NYC and living in DC, I’m still trying to figure out this city’s door holding etiquette. In New York, you can pretty much bank on the fact that someone won’t hold the door for you, unless you’re right on their tail and/or they make direct eye contact with you (thus creating some sort of required social politeness). But here, in DC, it seems that it’s polite to hold the door for someone walking up to, say, 20 feet behind you under certain circumstances. For example, how long do you wait and hold the door for someone if:
a) he/she obviously lives in your building?
b) he/she will obviously be entering/exiting your work place?
c) you make eye contact?
d) he/she is a complete stranger on the street?
e) you’re in a crummy mood?
f) you’re in a hurry?
It seems that the longest you should hold the door in any situation is if the person is MAXIMUM 20 quick walking-speed paces behind you. You standing, holding the door, any longer could make seem not extra sweet, but creepy/stalker-nice—like when a stranger makes smiles at you just a tad too long and you feel a bit icky.
My advice is to never look behind you when entering/exiting a building. Only if you hear footsteps close behind, as you’re opening the door, take a quick glance out of your periphery and hold the door for that person.
I’m sure there’s an equation for all this, but I was never that great at math.
2 comments:
Or what if the door is glass and you can see a reflection of a person coming behind you? Just another twist in the door-holding equation.. Hmm. Born and raised here and still figuring it out. I would also add whether you have to hold elevator doors for people. Is it bad that I get in the elevator and just want to press the "door close" button??
Indeed 'tis often a dilemma. However, in my new residence at Stuy Town, I have found my co-habitants to be more that cordial. The door is always held for me, and therefore I hold for others. The more perplexing situation may be the elevator door hold. One day I was right on a yound women's tail as we walked in the door -- she held the door for me. Then I went to my mailbox and stood there for approximately 5 whole minutes, sifting through the mail and even opening one item. I then, with head down still reading mail, headed to the elevator bank to find the young woman holding the door for me! She was there for so long, I was honestly flabberghasted at her nicety. It was refreshing.
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